I am now back in the UK after having been out of the realms of civilisation for a bit.. I finally left Japan after postponing my departure a few times due to live commitments and flight problems and headed to Delhi for a brief stop in India. I planned to meet Jedi Amanda to eat some proper samosas and to see some naughty cows.

The conclusion of my stay in Tokyo was great. I finished my last fews gigs, the highlight being at my regular haunt the Velvet sun where the following day I spent a day recording “Centre of the World” with my friend Shige who brought along some nice vintage preamps and his lovely microphones.

I got most of the track done,  tinkled on the grand piano and drank my own body weight in coffee which left me a shaking mess about 4 in the morning when we wrapped up to go for for Gyoza dumplings and Ramen noodle.

The weather has been very clement so that’s plenty of reason to go and hang out in some of the many parks that seem to attract the strangest of the strange folk. Me and Dan hung about in Yoyogi and watched a couple of ravers bust moves, fully clothed in the blazing sunshine to a tiny stereo playing very loud, distorted techno. The other day I saw a bloke with a cat on a lead.

People have interesting hobbies. My friend Rie took me to see her friend performing in a Hula show. It was a little odd but nice. Coconut shells work fairly well in a bikini but I dont know how comfortable they are to wear!

Went for a BBQ at Spider Steves house, met a dog in an FBI jacket and then pulled out the driving skills when I took part in the grand Super Mario Karts tournament.

As you may know, Karaoke is massive in Japan. When the sport came to the UK I think it kinda got lost in translation a little bit. In Japan, its usually undertaken in a group of friends, often in a private booth, everyone has a good time and encourages each other and its a right old laugh. In the UK if you DARE get up, half of the people in the public venue will be pointing and tittering, the rest will be either thowing pork scratchings at you or be telling you to f#*k off! (Maybe thats just Queens Head in Hedon)

Anyway, after my last gig at Cave Be in Shimokitazawa I had my first go on the Karaoke….class, although a word of advice… think through the song you plan to sing and then decide how hard it is. I decided to jump straight in with 2+2=5 by Radiohead …bit of a mistake. It was a touch on the difficult side. Dan on the other hand pulled out Galveston and Lonely Guy by Glen Campbell.. Needless to say I got hooked. You know its got a grip of you when you find that you elbowed some young girl in the top lip to grab the song list.

It was pretty emotional leaving Japan having met so many new friends and nice people. It had certainly begun to feel like home. I will however be returning in october for another tour with some new material and possibly another release… I have an appointment with a karaoke bar.

From Tokyo it was to the final leg of my journey and a place which couldn’t be more of a contrast to the sanitised world of the Japanese.

The heat and the dust smothers you when you arrive in Delhi. To avoid getting ripped off, I took a pre paid taxi to Paharganj. Its a bustling market area of the city which heaves with traders, beggars, scabby dogs and skinny cows grazing on piles of rubbish. I can only describe it as a shock to the senses. The smells that waft into the nostrils as you walk down the cluttered streets range from putrid to delicious and seem to change with every step. Sandalwood inscense drifts from tiny jewellery shops and old men sit cross legged feeding giant bubbling pans with spicy snacks.

After my first night, I went to a small mission near Rishikesh (made famous by the Beatles who visited to meet the Mahareshi Mahesh Yogi) to meet my friend Jedi Amanda who was teaching English at the Divia Prem Mission. There I stayed with about 200 kids whose parents are sufferers of Leprosy. The disease has a real stigma over there and most of the boys were rescued by relatives from a life of begging to be given an education and a brighter future. My first experience when I arrived was to sit at the evening Aarty which is a worship to the river Ganges which runs past the school. The kids chant and sing and play the drum as the sun sets over the river. It was really powerful stuff and it felt almost other worldy. When we all congregated for the daily prayers in the main hall afterwards, I was introduced to the boys as a guest and I played the theme tune to Last of the Summer wine on my Harmonica which seemed to go down pretty well! The following night I took my guitar and played some songs. There was a big thunderstorm outside but everyone gathered closer to hear and using Amandas teaching skills, we all had a go at Bob Marleys 3 little birds…”Dont worry about a thing”….

The kids are amazing. They never seem to stop smiling and it made me realise that you certainly dont need material trappings to be happy. It was all a bit humbling really. Unfortunately I managed to contract a stomach bug which left me in a state for about 4 days but when I came round we headed to Mussoorie to escape the intense heat for a few days. It is an Indian tourist town in the Himalayas and really shows the difference between the rich and the poor. In the centre of Mussoorie, there is a huge wooden roller skating rink that looks like it was built in the 70s, with a view over the mountains and roller boots that could should have been replaced about 15 years ago. I managed to do a few moves and almost break my neck while skating round to the sound of “Its my Life”. It was almost an exact reconstruction of a tampon advert.

After eating some Tibetan food we returned to the Mission and spent a couple more nights. I donated a couple of Harmonicas and gave them to one of the older boys to look after. During the evening I heard them echoing through the dormitories which was a great thrill.

Now I am back in sunny Hull and its all a bit like a dream. This week I am heading into the studio with my Amigo James Markham to start work on a live recording and there are a few gigs in the pipeline. Check my myspace page for dates. Take care.

After hitting the shores of Japan with little idea how things would work out playing live, I have played about 20 shows altogether in Tokyo, Osaka and Kyoto and it feels like there is a definite momentum building.

Guest house in Yudanaka

I just want to say hello and thanks to all the lovely people I have met and who have taken the time to come and chat and suffer my terrible Japanese. As it stands, I am going back to England at the start of June to do some recording and try to scrape some pennies together before heading back to Japan around October time for another tour with a bit more promotion and glossy paper around it. Everything was a bit spur of the moment this time but I guess thats made it all the more special.

Forthcoming gigs in Tokyo are …

Friday 24th April Planet K Kichijouji

Monday 27th April Marz Shinjuku

Saturday 9th May Cave Be Shimo Kitazawa

There is a place in Tokyo called Ochonamizu and it is packed full of music shops selling all manner of vintage and new guitars. I had a bit of a look and unfortunately had a bit of an accident. That accident involved my wallet, a shop assistant and a hand made Japanese acoustic guitar. So now I am the proud owner of a K.Yairi. I tried Gibsons and Taylors and other extravagant brands. I really cant afford to buy it and by doing so I am venturing into the world of debt but I figure if I am a professional musician then it is my tool and I should not scrimp. Tool. Plus I can say by not having spent money on alcohol for the last 3 years, I kinda saved it up for a moment like this…. I always start justifying everything I spend money on… its my mums fault bless her!

Anyway it sounds great and I will be using it to record new material in the summer so you will be hearing it soon.

hotel in Nagoya

Two weeks ago I had a break in my live schedule followed by a couple of shows in Osaka and Kyoto, so I headed of round Japan on the bullet train to do some sightseeing and meet some friends. Before taking the train I first traveled on the overnight bus for 11 hrs from Tokyo and started in Okayama city. I think I was a bit of a cheapskate (the fall out from the guitar purchase) when I booked the bus ticket because I had zero leg room and virtually non recline seats. I would been more comfortable lying on some broken glass.

Luckily there are vending machines everywhere in Japan and hot coffee in a can is a fantastic treat when you need a boost, so after caffeine and with a sleepy face I met up with and stayed a  couple of nights at my friends home.   We went to the island of Miyajima. It is a beautiful setting reached by boat and has a huge red gate in the harbour which is overlooked by temples and traditional buildings with tame deer roaming about randomly attacking tourists for food.

luverly ladies and blossom in Kyoto

A couple of years ago, I used to work for a Japanese chemical company near Hull in England. I was a control room operator…… Homer Simpson. Some Japanese guys came over for a year or so to build and start the chemical plant so I was lucky enough to become friends with them. I got in touch and we were able to meet up for a traditional meal. It was cool catching up and reminiscing about the boredom of 12 hr night shifts and their craving for wonderful English cuisine…Bacon Sandwiches, gravy and fish n chips. In the middle of the table at the restaurant was a bbq griddle and on it we cooked marinated slivers of intestine and stomach and beef. After testing the selection I stuck to the beef. I dont really enjoy organs unless its a Hammond.

At the beginning of my trip, the famous Japanese cherry blossom (Sakura) began to bloom and as I sped across the country on the effortless bullet train I gazed out onto rivers, parks, towns, shrines and temples all delicately framed and enhanced by beautiful pastel pink petals. The mood of the people seems to be affected too. I arrived to pleasant smiles and greetings by the locals of Nagasaki. It was the location of the second atomic bomb explosion in Japan which was 3 days after Hiroshima felt the force of the first one dropped by America. The bomb in Nagasaki was 3 times as big as Hiroshima and the atomic museum was fascinating and thought provoking. The heat at the hypocentre of the blast was over a million degrees. Artifacts included glass bottles which had melted and contained the bones of a human hand. The pictures of the victims were frightening and testimonies of the survivors made hairs stand up on the back of my neck.

paper cranes at peace memorial

On a more lighter note, after moving on, I spent a day riding a bike round Kyoto enjoying the blossom at close range and going to a night time display in one of the castles. Saw wild turtles in the river and then took a train through the mountains up to Yudanaka near Nagano. I was taken by the owner of the local guesthouse to an outside onsen (hot spring). Onsen are located all over Japan as the country is situated over an area of geothermal activity. These hot baths are usually segregated male and female and there is a ritual of self cleaning and nudity you must follow when using one.  I was lucky enough to arrive fairly late up in the mountains which meant I found myself sat relaxing alone under a full moon and the stars.

It was a bit weird when the guesthouse owner came to take a photo of me. I was sat on the edge of the bath in the buff at the time so had to quickly slip under the water to avoid the heat magazine scoop shot.

munky

The following day I visited another hot spring where snow monkeys gather to bathe and keep warm in the harsh cold of the winter. The weather has hit mid spring however and it was very warm so the monkeys were running about and fighting. After hanging out with them for a bit, I went to Osaka for a gig. On route I managed to go to the Factory where my spanking new guitar was born, a place called Gifu. I was given a tour by a very pleasant chap and like a true guitar geek I drooled over the shoulder of master craftsmen as they shaved wood and sanded bone to construct beautiful works of art…ahhh

absolutely no need

After that quick stop, I was dropped off at the local station and made th last leg of my journey. I played at a tiny club called Tehanno where the owner and staff were welcoming and friendly. I had a great gig alongside a wonderfully talented accordian player called Yossi then ran across the city to just make the final check in time for the capsule hotel.

home sweet home

The capsule concept is a little bizarre to say the least. It is an all male hotel where you are issued with a locker key, dressing gown, one size fits all boxer shorts and a towel. I was shown to my capsule which was located down a corridor that resembled a giant two story filing cabinet system (see pic). Each space is fairly small but has a little TV and radio inside and a blind that can be pulled down for privacy. There are common rooms where the men hang out in their dressing gowns smoking, using their mobile phones and coughing up phlegm loudly.

capsule

I had another gig in Osaka (at See Ya!) the following night and although I was 1 hour late due to poor planning, was greeted at the venue by the owner and his family barbecuing fish outside in the evening sun. I played my set and we ate kebabs and chatted for hours. I think the night was easily one of the highlights of my trip just due to the company and kind warmth of the people.

everyone at See Ya! in Osaka

I was able to play the gigs in Osaka and Kyoto thanks to the help of Usagi Yamada, a great singer songwriter who was approached by my friend Daisuke. I stayed two nights at his parents house in Kyoto with fellow musician Makoto Ueno and we hung out and talked about world domination in our respective genres! I have learnt a lot in the last couple of weeks and enjoyed the gentle nature of the Japanese people. Its interesting to see the difference between the buzz of Tokyo and the rest of Japan.

On arriving back at Dans place, I have had a few more gigs and even guested with friend Daisukes band as they played a heavy funk version of one gallon drum. I was probably the most nervous I have been before a show. Its like a substitute coming on half way through the FA cup final I reckon. It sounded cool though.

Back to reality a bit…just gonna do the hoovering and washing up before Dan finishes work..earn my keep. Mata ne.. Ciao..

Its shortly after having played an enjoyable show at the lovely intimate acoustic venue, Velvet sun in Ogikubo, Tokyo. Myself and my amigo Dan Moran are sat in his flat, with feet up, a cuppa tea, eating a scone and we are both ringing home to say happy mothers day to our mums. Yer can take the lad out of England but yer cant take England out of the Lad!!!

(me and Dan and Natsuki at velvet sun)

I have played about 6 shows here in Tokyo and am really enjoying it. Yesterday Dan made his stage debut guesting with me on A Drawer which sounded mint.  The people are friendly, the club staff are efficient and helpful and the standard of musicianship among other artists is very high. There is a huge pop culture in Japan and love it or hate it, that does come across in a lot of bands music.

I met a fine Chap called Daisuke at Velvet Sun. He came to England some time ago and was helped to book some live shows, so in kind he has helped me book a number of slots around Tokyo to contribute to my tour. That is testament to the helpfulness of the Japanese which seems to know no bounds. I have struggled finding small live houses and been rescued by fellow musicians who after consulting for directions have approached the police for me, used e-phones to find maps and guided me streets out of their way, right up to the door of the venue before saying Sayonara.

(Me n John on Japanese TV)

(at Cave Be in Shimokitazawa)

Its a fact that packaging and marketing people in Asia like to use a certain amount of English words to sell their products. Rightly or wrongly, they pick out a choice word to name their product and in doing so provide some amusement to visiting English speakers. At first it seemed very strange to consider drinking a bottle of “Sweat” during or after excercise. I was also highly amused when friend Jacqui explained that after seeing a dispenser labeled “Skin milk” in her hostel bathroom, she assumed the product was a moisturizing lotion and for two days, applied it to her face and let it soak in expecting beautiful results. It wasn’t until the irritation started that she realised it was actually liquid soap…ha!

(Octopus or pie)

I spent a day with Jacqui and Mr Merrington in Akihabara, often referred to as Electric city. We were escorted by their good friend and key-tar player for Tokyo pop girl band “The Moist Towelettes” …Dave. I was introduced to him the previous night after which we went to a Karaoke bar where he blasted out an amazing performance of Rio by Duran Duran to the cocky English lighting crew who were there to work on the Oasis tour. They were goading everyone to have a go and clearly weren’t expecting anyone to follow up.

It was in Akihabara that we went to retro gaming nirvana …Super potato. It is nestled between electrical goods shops and maid bars. A maid bar is a place where you can go to be served coffee by girls dressed in very cute maid outfits wearing knee length socks and looking like they just stepped out of “The Wizard of Oz”…indeed. Super Potato is like a Mecca for gaming freaks. The real connoisseurs of gaming who appreciate the early consoles and the playability of classic super mario bros. It was awesome having a blast on some of the old stuff. I tried a special 3d game console that was never released in the 90s because they found it gave people headaches. I couldnt leave it alone… I went next door and bought a special mic connection for my Ipod so I can record samples with it…joy.

Went to a baseball batting centre for the first time. Baseball is massive here. You can stand in a net and have 100kph balls pitched at you for a few quid. Its pretty cool. I couldn’t hit the thing for love nor money at first but after a while I started to connect with a few. I think the fact that there was a girl in the adjacent net smashing every ball, made me feel a bit uncomfortable.

That evening we met another friend of Andy’s and had Okinawan food in a tiny family restaurant. It included pickled pig ears and boiled pig trotters..mmm…. my favourite.

(fancy shutter painting)

So there is a 4 digit code to get into the apartment block where I am crashing with my Amigo Dan. I went out for a few hours the other evening and and chatted sh*t in local bar, Zzyx, with Dans mate Steve who has lived out here for about 10yrs. Anyway it got to about 3:00 am and I headed back to bed only to find I had forgotten the code. After trying several times, I found that I had locked out the keypad. I rushed back to Steve who at this point was pretty drunk and got him to ring Dan to come and let me in. There was no answer. Two girls had now arrived at the apartment who knew the code but were now unable to use the keypad. It was pouring with rain and blowing a howling gale…… Suddenly Steve lurched into action. I have no idea how he did it, but he climbed 5 stories, pissed, starting with a 7ft fence up a skinny little drainpipe over balconies and railings with wind and rain rushing into his face and his foothold slipping several times. I must say I was expecting to call an ambulance at any moment. He got to the balcony and banged on the patio window until I heard Dan open up with a “What the F*ck!”. When he emerged at the front door to let us in, his first line to the girls who were showering him with praise was “this is Terry… he is a musician… come to his show”…then with a wink he disappeared into the night with blood, cuts and filth all up his arms… a proper surreal moment….hero.

(you ming!….this is actually chinese I think)

I have some copies of my album to give away at forthcoming gigs. I cant do free-climbing up apartment buildings but I can play the odd tune so if yer want one then come and say Hello. Ja mata ne!

So I am sitting at a dining table on a verandah in the rainforest after an amazing Lamb roast dinner listening to stories of visiting Japan with Sean Connery and Roald Dahl and of life in London in the theatre in the 60’s. That is not a situation in which yer average lad from Yorkshire often finds himself.

Despite Cyclone weather and flooded roads, I made it up to Port Douglas in the North Queensland tropics and spent two days with Diane Cilento an incredible woman who started life as the daughter of two highly respected medics in Brisbane and through her determination, went to England to study theatre at the Royal Academy. Diane went on to become a successful actress, writer and director and was nominated for an Academy Award. In addition to all this she become dubbed Mrs James Bond when she married Sean Connery which invariably lead to some problems often associated with excessive fame …people breaking into her house, stalking her kids etc..

Diane now runs the Karnak playhouse set in the Queensland rainforest near Mossman. Its an idyllic lakeside setting where she puts on all manner of shows as well as farming organic fruit from her tropical fruit trees. I stayed at a house called the Ritz which was the first house on the land which she acquired some years ago. I shared it with a white cat called Prism and a Bandecoot that came crashing around the kitchen in the middle of the night looking for food. Diane`s friend, a kind Sri Lankan lady called Delini, lives in a house nearby and I popped over one evening for Breadfruit chips, mended her speaker system and we listened to Abbey Road by the Beatles.

The room I stayed in at the Ritz had a thai double bed and two walls made entirely of mosquito net. The insect and animal noise was incredible and it was possible to look out at night into the forest from the bed and see the moon overhead, or on cloudy evenings, see the distant flashes of lightning as tropical storms moved through the mountains.

We chatted about all sort of things over dinner including the state of the planet and the choke of global marketing.  Her stories were fascinating and my time there although short will make a everlasting memory. I am determined to return when hopefully I can perform at Karnak although It would have to be a spectacular show to do the venue justice.

After Leaving Diane, I had planned on splashin out to do a dive course in Cairns and was really excited about it. It wasn`t until I got to the half way point on the first day of tuition that I was told by the medical doctor that she would fail me because I used to have asthma and hadnt been clear for long enough. Apparently if you have an attack under water and then surface, your lungs can explode….instant fish food. Instead, I hooked up with Nic noo noo, John WHATson and Alice cream teas and took a day trip out to the Barrier reef and did some snorkelling. It was like an underwater paradise in million different colours and more than made up for the disappointment.

To sum it up….Having dinner with possums, seeing dolphins at the beach in the shallows at dusk under a glorious sunset,  learning to ride a motorbike beside kangaroos hopping around in the outback, seeing Gecko lizards scurry across the walls of your bedroom hoovering up moths and insects, finding giant crickets and hairy huntsman spiders as big as your hand on your sleeping bag, walking for miles on white sand without seeing another soul, enduring blistering heat with inviting turquoise seas full of deadly stingers…oh and Big Mamas pie shop. Its got the lot.

After kissing goodbye the 40 degree warmth of Northern Australia I landed in the bitterly cold and snowy 4 degrees of Tokyo. Once the teeth had stopped chattering I went to meet Dan Moran the Man from Japan. His flat here in the bustling city will be my base for the next month or so. He has helped me sort out a bunch of gigs for march. I had my first one last friday which was a little rough around the edges to say the least but nevertheless very enjoyable. It was at Cave Be and I was joined by a wonderful singer songwriter called Yumiko and a crazy Kate Bush/Bjork/free form jazz alt outfit that were a bit special.

Japan is the most intriguing place I have been. I came here a year and a half ago to play some show with my band Ernest and fell in love with it. Where else can you buy a magazine with a round up of japanese events in pictures that include crying corporate executives, cute fluffy animals and a nude man bent over with a sex toy inserted where the sun doesnt shine… bizarre.

The mentality regarding wildlife here is a little strange. If it isnt human then its probably edible. In the Tokyo fish market I saw fish intestines on a kebab stick and a plethora of whelks and Mollusks that looked like they had been picked from the surface of the moon. I ordered a plate of wonderful looking stir fry at a restaurant two days ago, only to be greeted by a plate of deep fried knuckles. Mmmm….gristle…my favourite…

Last night I played at Shinjuku Marz and straightened out a few mess ups from the last show although I am still getting to grips with my looping pedal and diamond skeleton synthezizer stomp box (its just the name I like). Quite a few people turned up which was cool and I managed to bumble my way through some Japanese in between songs. Walking down neon lit streets afterward s, I passed waves of boys and girls all made up like they were due to be featured on Pop Idol. Hair style is king here. I felt like the court jester.  A few people came for a drink and Ironically enough, we were steered into an English Pub. Its my all time worst choice of venue in a foreign land but the road leads to where its lead …or something like that.

These are my other live dates for March…

Australia really is an island of extremes. At the moment, over 100 people have been killed in Victoria among uncontrollable forest fires and roads are blocked in the north of Queensland as Cyclone weather disrupts travel networks. I am due to meet with ex hollywood actress Diane Cilento whom I originally contacted over a year ago to ask permission to use some of her dialogue which I sampled from film “The Wickerman” for use in an Ernest track (Ernest being my former band). We have stayed in touch since and after almost meeting at an ‘exit calm’ gig in London last year, we will finally meet in person hopefully when I manage to get to Cairns. I sent Diane a copy of the Man-made album and she has offered me a gig at her rain forest theatre after the rainy season so I must return!

After my stint from the Blue mountains near Sydney where I spent new year, I had a catch up with sis Nic and Debbie Donut who had been Partying hard in my absence and found I had an invitation to go to the southern most Australian state, Tasmania, to meet some friends. In true british style, I ummmd and agghed about the cash for the flight but then took the plunge. After picking up a few effects pedals for my acoustic guitar I went for a drink with Dr Rob an anaesthetist friend who had been kind enough to invite us to his beautiful victorian townhouse for an xmas day party, show us bondi beach and to lend me his tent for my time in the mountains. Before jumping on the plane I managed to score a mind blowing vietnamese meal with Caroline Hawley a friend from back home (no relation to Richard) who offered me some gigs at her cafe bar (the tour dates are coming together)

Tazzie… Aussies abbreviate anything that can be abbreviated!… was quite breathtaking. I stayed with a friend of Andy Merrington - Legendary Ginger, Aussie, guide bloke Brad. His house in Hobart is essentially an open door for Backpackers and travelling souls who manage to find their way there. During my stay, he had to have a large splinter of wood removed from his foot which became stuck in there about a month previous on a hike through the bush. After surgery he held a sample bottle aloft in triumph with something 3 times bigger than the average matchstick rattling about inside it. Never once before the operation, climbing up cradle mountain and guiding us around the local Market (great sausage butties) did he complain about the pain…. that seems to be the aussie way.

He took us on a night drive along a stretch of road which had more marsupials hanging out than piss heads in Hull city centre on a saturday night. There were Wombats, Wallabies, Quolls, Echidnas, Pademelons and Tasmanian devils. Funnily enough, Tasmanian devils dont look anything like the Warner Brothers character, although some of their bizarre shrieks and wails sounded familiar…. Hull city centre on a Saturday night.

We drove up the Tasmanian coast and saw pristine waters, stunning coastline and a picture postcard wineglass bay, so named due to its immaculate circular shape, before heading on to camp on one of the many beaches. We saw a magical orange moon come up over the ocean and light up the bay. It was a good excuse to build a fire, play some music and enjoy Mr Merringtons hilarious moves.. Irish dancing on smack…

On the plane on the way back i made friends with a wonderful lady, Constance Millar from an island east of Brisbane. She told me about her tranquil life over there and invited me to stay.

Had tickets to The Big Day Out on the Gold coast and saw some live music. The choice and style of bands seemed really commercial. The Arctic Monkeys were disappointing. Alex Turner was more bothered about his big new hair than giving a wholehearted show and they changed parts of tracks to keep it interesting for themselves which is fair enough I suppose but it lost something for me. Highlights were My Morning Jacket and Eddy Current Suppression Ring. The latter are fronted by a double golf glove wearing nut job who cant get enough of the adrenaline and puts his head into speakers, stage dives ungracefully (losing his gold chain) and generally has a screw loose which gives the band an awesome edge.

After a couple of days on the gold coast which is predominantly a highly marketed, high rise party strip with a lack of soul but a monstrous surf beach, I jumped on a water taxi and took up Connie’s invitation for a couple of laid back days on North Stradbroke island. I was met with tea and home made pumpkin scones, cooked Blue Eyed Trevellan (fish) bought from the local fisherman on the BBQ and played some guitar for Constance and Lilly (her Maltese cross). I tried a bit of surfing while Connie did her crocheting and ended up paddling endlessly through huge crashing waves for approx 3 hrs until I was sick of it.  Good education on the movement of the ocean.

I met Connie’s Daughter Nicole and Grandson Richard. He told me in gory detail about a shark attack on a girl in the water only a few yards away from him. The girl made it to shore but she had been bitten so badly in the upper leg and arms that she bled to death before she could make it to the hospital in Brisbane. He explained that she was swimming at dusk and there had been a lot of bait fishing during the day and there were dolphins nearby. I guess you have to minimise the risk where possible. I went swimming on the same beach as part of Connies morning routine but it was first thing in the morning and we didnt stray far from the shore. Needless to say I felt a little uneasy.

Went to Byron bay (the drug capital of Australia apparrently). Sat on a beach (again) and contemplated life. Visited a chap called Tom Moonie, a championship winning ex Manly Rugby League player who met my old man. Left a brand new T-shirt in the local swimming pool changing room.

Rockhampton is the Beef capital of Australia. It trades and exports thousands of cattle a day. There is a pub called the Great North Western and I swear you could be in the heart of texas sitting in its undercover Rodeo arena. We went to see the Bull riding training night. Young lads with an unhealthy lack of fear jump onto raging beasts which are then unleashed into the dirt paddock. It is truly a fine spectacle. One chap was knocked out cold, barely escaped having his head squashed by the pounding hooves and appeared to have a fit. Although he didnt have much balance when he came to, he managed to walk out of the ring with his remaining dignity being shattered by the compere who pointed out to the crowd via a PA system, the young bull rider’s shortcomings.

Tried Estelle’s famous date loaf…super.

Saw a red back spider in the bush. She kills y’know.

Hope you had a great xmas and may the new year bring you all yer greedy little hopes and aspirations.

After flying into Melbourne, I went to stay with My cousin and her family (The lovely Slingsby’s) in the suburbs and had an awesome 10 days. They have emigrated over as do many british citizens to live the life of their dreams.

They now enjoy a whopping house with swimming pool, home cinema (a la MTV cribs) games room and all importantly a spot of sunny weather. We watched films and played with Bailey their jack Russell, feeding her chicken necks and making her pee with excitement.

Went to see the photographic exhibition of Rennie Ellis who worked for worldwide magazines including Playboy and changed Australian social photography with the ‘Candid shot’ He was asked to shoot flamboyant parties of the rich and famous. http://www.rennieellis.com.au/. Some great hedonistic pictures (tits and arse shots) and a real insight into the days of excess (see how I pinched some of that from the website!)

Melbourne is uber cool in places and is said to be the cultural capital of Australia. The place is alive with great venues, music, restaraunts, vintage clothes shops and galleries. I Played an open mic night at the Blue Tile club in Fitzroy. The host was a bit odd. An embarassing but talented cross between Craig David, Eminem and Barry White. The other artists included a great american stand up comedian who was a little bit Bill Hicks in places and an aboriginal chap who sang about his youth, when he had been taken away from his parents to an orphanage with all the other mixed race kids. That was during the period that the Australian government carried out their right to be a bunch of twats.

Checked out Nouvelle Vague, the mellow French acoustic band who cover Punk classics in a chilled out latin style. Instead of the two French singers in the line up, one had been replaced by a 6ft plus blonde goddess who performed with immaculate cabaret expertise and although at times seemed to be larger than the band themselves, put on a great show. Towards the end of the gig, as the Percussionist charged on with a hip shaking Rumba, the blonde girl jumped down into the front of the crowd shaking the tassles of her 30’s flapper dress and proceeded to head straight towards me. At this point my heart started beating out of my chest with the thought of having to dance with her. She stopped in front of me and put her hand on my shoulder continuing to goad the crowd into joining her in a colossal dance off. Being stone cold sober, its normally difficult to prise my dancing mojo out of the depths of my soul.  As my head swam over the crowd and the beat became distant and muffled I followed her up onto the stage and everyone had vanished leaving us alone face to face. We danced by the light of the moon and then the night was over and what actually happened? Well in MY head thats what happened.

Being in Sydney, you would expect that I went to see one of the greatest firework displays in the worlds best natural harbour setting. No. Instead I decided to spend 10 days in the mountains with 150 other people avoiding eye contact, not speaking a word and learning the art of meditation.  If you say the word meditation to some people, often they immediately think weirdo or magic carpets or any number of other strange things. Now let me just make this plain. Meditating can give you a buzz that is like taking drugs. But guess what. You dont take ANY drugs. Thats right… and furthermore, the type of meditation practised in this course doesnt make you steal from your family, become lazy or have withdrawals. It actually makes you a BETTER PERSON. Now thats a bit difficult for a lot of people to digest including myself but it may become apparent if you check it out. Look at Dhamma.org if you want to know more.

It wasn’t until after this intensive event that I found out a little bit about the people who had sat in silence, within touching distance, cross legged and in pain for 10 days. It was a surge of chattering and information at the beginning which was quite overwhelming. I got a lift back to Sydney with Cameron, the Australian mixed martial arts and NSW thai kick boxing champion. He is a personal trainer in Manly and has an incredible knowledge of alternative medicines and physical awareness. We nattered about psychedelic drugs, shamens and I said I would give him a few good places to visit when he heads to South America later this year. Sam, a vinyl junkie who runs a day care centre, said after the second day he wanted to run over to the microphone at the front of the meditation hall and just start beatboxing and telling dirty jokes. I must say, I fancied doing a bit of half arsed break dancing down the aisle through all the attendees and occasionally felt like shrieking obscenities for the hell of it. John from Harrogate told me about how interesting the activity in the surroundings were whilst eating his spaghetti bolognese in an ethiopian brothel plus how he found different ways of eating camel during his recent motor bike journey a la Ewan McGregor (minus the support team) from England to Sydney.

And seeing as many may have given up booze as a new years resolution, here is the ultimate cocktail recipe from Joel who is a bar specialist and works in 5 star hotels in Mumbai designing cocktail menus.

Crush up some good Chocolate (not milk chocolate) with a couple Cinnamon sticks, add to splash of whisky, splash of butterscotch shnapps, Pure Mango juice, then strain twice onto ice. MMmmmmm….

And we’ll call that one “The art of living”.

oh and this is a great review from Rock n Reel Magazine

The other day I went to Hot water beach. Sounds a little strange. The sea is pretty cold as most seas are, however you can make your own hot spa.

Just hire a spade from the local shop, then head down to a spot by the rocks on the sand and dig a hole. You have to do this two hours either side of low tide in order for it to be possible because the ’special’ place gets covered by the sea most of the day.  As with most holes that are dug in sand at sea level, they fill with water however at this location a fresh spring water reservoir which is heated geothermically seeps up to fill your hole with water at a temperature of roughly 60 degrees Celsius..thats HOT! Its too hot for most people to bathe in, so by mixing your very own spa water with a couple of bucket fulls from the sea you can create the perfect bath. Then just jump in and relax.

Over the last month I have played a couple of impromptu outdoor gigs and managed to do a bit more sampling. I need to pick up a few bits and pieces for my live show as its quite stripped down. I wasnt thinking cymbals between the knees or anything like that but just a couple of effects pedals and maybe something else..

I Met up with my Dad …Ged…for those who dont know, he is a bit of a Rugby League legend (played for Great Britain and Hull Kingston Rovers) and came over to Australia for the world cup. It was awesome to catch up with the man and we went to say hello to a couple of ex Kiwi players he used to play/coach with. They are Mark Broadhurst and Gordon Smith both of whom played for the New Zealand national side. It was really interesting hearing them talk about brawls and battles on the field during their playing careers. Mark re-lived a game in which he was headbutted at the start by a player who singled him out and broke his cheekbone in three places and I was blown away to hear that he managed to play the rest of the game with one eye completely closed. The game was a lot dirtier back then and I got a great insight into how gritty it often became.

After Ged left us we headed over to the west coast of the South Island. The mountains are titanic. We did some mountain bike trails in Queenstown and ate a mammoth burger the size of a human head from a place called Fergburger. When I think back, I can just picture a wall of meat in a bread bun.

We went to see a film called the Counterfeiter about a money forging project in a prisoner of war camp. The cinema was in Wanaka and instead of the regular seats, there were a range of sofas and lounge furniture. There was even half a morris minor in there so you could sit behind the steering wheel and watch through the windscreen if thats what yer fancy.

The film was interesting and reminded me of my Grandpa who was a master forger in one of the prison camps in Germany. He had trained as a Lithographer before the war and was skilled in touch up work which meant he had an extremely good hand for painting detail. He would make passports and gate passes for escapees that made attempts on breaking out. He was a prisoner of war for 3 years and survived to the end. Now he lives near my mum and dad in Hedon.

So I went on a three day hike over a mountain range to get a bit of fresh air. I went with some luverley Devonshire folk ..clotted cream scones, well educated etc and of course Mr Merrington, JW and Nic. On the second morning after a nights sleep in a hut part way along the so called Kepler track, I was in the kitchen area limbering up. By limbering I mean proper lunges with my foot up on a large wooden bench similar in pose to an olympic 400mrunner. Essentially I was just horsing around until the bench slipped. slamming down onto my big toe. Of course Everyone was laughing uncontrollably, and I was waiting for the pain to subside so I could join them in the redicule. Anyway it was fairly unrelenting and the toe went black as hell immediately. I acted on instructions to put my foot under some cold water so I put my leg up to the sink under the cold tap at which point the blood drained from my head and I felt like I was going to collapse. I made my excuses and headed off to have a lie down but I only got as far as the middle of the kitchen floor before I had to lie there and then before I fell down.

The next thing I knew I was being woken up from what was like a strange dream by Alice Creamteas who luckily enough is a nurse. I havent ever fainted before but it was a bit like I was tripping or something. Not good.

After a bowl of porridge and the colour was back in my cheeks, I had to walk for two days over a mountain. Unfortunately that meant that by the end of my breath of fresh air, the big toe was a swollen mess. After a few hours of unbearable pain it was decided that the best course of action was to put a hole in the swelling to relieve the pressure. We got a needle from a travel sewing kit and got to work with some camping surgery.  After I had bled for a bit, the throbbing subsided and I was feeling much better. I treated myself to a slap up tea and all was well. Its a bit of a state now though. Good walk though.

I am back in Christchurch now. Ive learnt how to play backgammon by the Amanda the jedi master, seen dolphins, seals, penguins, possums, llamas, black coral,  a stack of sheep and I even stroked a tiny ginger piglet. NZ has definately got the widlife thing going on and I might well return for a bit longer.. we’ll see. Tomorrow its over to Melbourne in Australia for a new adventure where I am hoping to meet up with a few friends, go on a bit of a road trip and will probably be getting into some bother.

So, we were at the airport in Santiago ready to get a flight over to New Zealand and this guy comes over wearing a uniform and asks if we would be willing to stay in Chile for another night because the flight was full. The deal was that we were to stay in the Sheraton hotel for the night and the following day, with meals, plus $300 (or $800 off LAN flights). Errr lets just think about that for a minute.

So, back at the Sheraton, in the pool after having a decent nights kip in a luxury room with top notch fodder and ….wait for it… a bath, things are pretty cushy. Being paid for lounging about in a hotel, playing my guitar and watching films is something I could get used to. On arriving back at the airport that evening to take our flight we were approached once more by the same chap who asked if we would be interested in doing the same again but we pulled faces and ummed and aaghed and so we got $400 (or $1200 off LAN flights) and again I found myself in a hotel, sleeping, playing a bit of tennis (in skinny fit jeans) with the superlative king Andy Merrington and Jacqui Walls and generally getting paid for chilling out.

The following night…….yep you guessed. Same chap but slightly different deal. Would we fly to L.A where we would be given a hotel room for the day and then a connecting flight in the evening to Auckland. We got paid $500 (or $1600 blah blah). I am gettin on the plane and next to us in the Queue is Elijah Wood. Obviously I gave him my autograph when he asked. It was a bit strange really and It was fairly difficult to get John Watson to stop whispering “dirty little hobbitsis!”

So, there I am in Beverley hills and down Hollywood Boulevard among Jack Nicholson’s hand print, various Batmen, freaks and Elvis. The Hotel was a suite and had no less than 2 wide-screen TVs and a bar. We had complimentary meals again…welcome to the US…enough to feed the 5000. After a whirlwind trip around the 100 mile city and an impressive stop at the observatory in the Hollywood hills I got the flight to New Zealand.

Although the arrival in NZ was delayed, it was worth it (I was Skint!). Now I’m here though, this country is off the scale when it comes to breathtaking views and wildlife. I have been here 3 weeks now and have travelled the North Island, been in Caves and floated under glow worm constellations, biked 100’s of km across mountainous ranges and walked empty moonlit beaches. Its like a giant film set. Funnily enough the Dirty little Hobbit we encountered on the plane featured alongside New Zealand in its big claim to fame as the starring role in The Lord of The Rings. Its not difficult to see why it was chosen, with its smouldering volcanic landscapes and colourful thermal lakes and pools.

We are in the South Island now and plan to do a bit of extreme stuff as this is the capital of all that extreme stuff. A giant bungee jump might be on the cards but we’ll have to see what Mr bank manager says. Everyone from back home is talking about the credit thing but its difficult to get a grasp on it all when yer in the great outdoors. I might just have to live in my tent for the rest of my days using the money from a bit of busking and hitching the planet. I Just read “Into the wild”. Its the story about Chris McCandless, the chap who abandoned his life to live on nothing but his ingenuity and resourcefulness in the Alaskan wilderness. Its quite inspiring and struck a chord somewhere deep inside.

My album is officially out now in all the proper digital places and stuff which is cool, Play.com, Itunes blah blah. (see top of page) Its a bit of a struggle to get anybody to giv it a listen at magazines or owt like that but fingers crossed…

There are a few rules when you pass a police checkpoint. Follow the instructions you are given, clearly and precisely. Don’t say anything which might lead an officer to become suspicious.

So we left El Bolson in the Andes. I previously stated that it is a bit of a hippie town so you could understand why a police checkpoint down the road might have reason to employ a sniffer dog to ensure the highway isnt used as a trafficking route for Marijuana.

Now, I was lead to believe that sniffer dogs were highly trained instruments, unphased by something as insignificant as a chorizo sausage. It would appear not. So on picking up an interesting smell in the boot of our hire car (chorizo) our belongings were hauled out and our last possession strewn out across the road and combed finely for incriminating evidence. For some reason unknown, I then decided, in a thoughtless “trying to break the ice” manner, it would be a good idea to mention that I USED to smoke weed and that it was a few years ago and I dont do it any more. Bad move. It was approximately an hour later after having been searched “thoroughly” we were allowed to scrape our stuff up and get back on our way. Needless to say I was full of apologies and regret. Hindsight (common sense) is a wonderful thing.

On the ferry down south into Chile I found a chap from Colorado who believe it or not had a horses tooth tattoed on his leg. It is actually the shape of the mountain range that he lives near and cooincidentally happens to look like a horses tooth. I got a picture of my horses tooth next to his tattoo of a horses tooth. I told some people I met about that. I wonder why people think thats weird.

I guess most people have seen a glacier on TV. Its the big, jagged lump of impressive, bluey coloured ice that breaks away in gigantic pieces causing mini tsunamis . To see the Perito Morena Glacier in Argentinas Patagonia in the flesh is a bit like being at Disney Land. It could well be just a right big piece of fibre glass with a bag full of special effects all over it. I havent been to Disney Land, but I was told so by Courtney from Colorado (incidentally the girlfriend of Joe…the chap who´s horses tooth shaped tattoo I took a pic of with my horses tooth) Its mighty surreal and although it rained as if we were in the UK it was still incredible.

On the way back into Chile from Argentina, we had to go through the checkpoint and declare whether we had any organic materials including fruit and veg. I left my guitar case on the bus which was mistake number one. The officials dragged it, bouncing down the steps of the bus along with some other hand luggage, to the inspection area. He called me over to go through my rucksack…deja vu. I was then asked if I had any fruit to which I replied no. He then asked me if I was sure. I said I was sure, I hadnt had any fruit for days. He asked me again if I was sure. Again I answered yes. Once more he asked and again I said confidently I was sure. He then asked for me to open my guitar case and so I did. To my shock, a scabby looking orange sat inside the case, a bit of the peel missing. My heart sank and blood rushed to my head. All the people around me in the queue looked down their noses and the guy´s colleague delighted in telling me about the heavy fines for FRUIT SMUGGLING and that he had asked me three times. “PREGUNTAS TRES VEZ! TRES VEZ!…..TRES VEZ!” Anybody would think it was a shipment of dust. As it happened they let me off with a bollocking. I escaped the “thorough” search that time. Is it me or has the world gone mad. It was an orange.

I heard Hull City beat Arsenal at the Emirates stadium. I also found out that Elbow won the Mercury music award. There is a God.

I travel to New zealand in a week.

I have been in Argentina now for bout 3 weeks and I can feel me heart screaming at me to stop eating steak. Its difficult not to when its so cheap. I kid you not they are the weight of a small child and I should know, I´ve eaten enough of em. Small children that is.

Spent a night in Salta following the border crossing. Saw a mummified child in the local museum who had been struck by lightning hundreds of years ago and preserved on a mountain top. Got a bus down to Buenos Aires and sat next to Sergio, an engineer who told me about his wife and three girlfriends and how Argentina was “muchas sex” (with actions).

Spent 5 nights in Buenos Aires and could have probably stayed for a year or so. Went to a park with hundreds of stray cats milling about. Saw Eva Peron´s grave at the majestic Recoleta cemetary and splashed out on a proper Tango show which was immaculate.

Clubs dont start until 2 or 3 in the morning so yer need to adjust yer body clock and look the part if yer going out to pull an Argentinian lady friend. Ground work is fairly tough going and even then you´ll be fortunate if yer get a look in. So I heard from Jodie.

We planned to go to the Boca Juniors football match but unfortunately missed it deciding to head further south although ate at a restaraunt “Don Carlitos” across the road from the stadium which was an experience in itself. The place was clearly full of gangsters with henchmen hanging about outside watching expensive cars. The amenable owner proudly explained that the system was to sit down and eat exactly what he decided to bring out to you. The food was impecable and the proud chap shared some stories of the celebrities who had eaten there. Some Maradonna lookie likie tried to sell us a photo opportunity so I gave him some slaver about the hand of god and we kicked him into touch…

I spent the last of my pennies for the month, contributed to the global warming issue and got a flight down to Bariloche to try a bit of skiing. I spent a lot of time eating snow and doing big chin slides but met some interesting people/nutjobs. Played catch the face with Sarah ” what voice?” Moxon which involved a bit of serious gurning and was very silly indeed…

After a week of hanging out in Bariloche, shot over to the other side of Argentina on a road trip across the Patagonian wilderness. We were in Butch Cassidy and the Sundance kid territory and its a fairly ruthless landscape. Saw plenty of dead dogs, a dead horse, dead horse bones, (got meself a horse tooth for the collection), some ostriches and 6ft wide condors. Unfortunately the boot on the car was broken and we were driving down unpaved roads so it was like being inside a vacuum cleaner.

Near Puerto Madryn we drove to a peninsula and saw whales, penguins, elephant seals and an Armadillo. This is discovery channel stuff! Its the place where the killer whales come out of the ocean and eat the seals as they learn to swim.

After soaking up some serious nature, we drove across to El Bolson, a quiet hippy town in the Patagonian Andes where we ran into some folks from Buenos Aires at the friendliest place I ever stayed at. The Owner Claudio took me to the supermarket to buy our tea and we barbecued a full side of cow, translated bad jokes for each other between spanish and english (with very poor results) and played beatles and shakira songs on our guitars!

After the road trip, took a bus across the border into Chile with Tim from San fransisco and James and Hannah Mafia from the UK and then got on a freight ferry down through the fords and mountains of southern patagonia towards the Moreno glacier.

I finished writing another song but I dont know what its called yet. I think its gonna be about some missed opportunity and the wilderness.

My album is coming out in a week or two and It will be available to pick up from some shops and this very website which is pretty exciting. Its mainly my own work with a helpin hand from a few friends. If yer buy it I hope yer like it. Hasta Luego